It’s no lie when I say I’ve always felt like I don’t really fit in with the rest of the world. My mother always referred to me as the kid who has 100 friends. She was and is correct. Among this group I have always felt like the cheese who stands alone. Living with my cancer, currently treated with Crizotinib, contributes to this isolated feeling.
I am so very thankful for Crizotinib as it allows me to live more closely to the life I had before cancer. However, it is a tricky space to be. My cancer buddies are constantly being beaten up by their chemo or radiation. My non-cancer friends are striving for promotions at work or planning vacations to distant places. I am doing neither; yet I get caught up thinking of both. I am aware that my cancer friends’ fates will probably be my own and I also dream of travel to distant places or for a fabulous backyard remodel.
I am an able disabled person. I am a non-sick sick person. Striving to be grateful for each and every day.